Porn [Part 1] Negative effects of porn on our culture and why my essay was rejected.

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(I don’t own any of the photos used in this post)

Earlier this summer I wrote an essay and submitted it to be graded. It was rejected because “it wasn’t personal enough to my own experience.” I was really upset, considering I am passionate about the subject I chose to write about, and I was not impressed that it was rejected based on that reasoning. (Quite frankly I think it was more an issue of material choice that caused a problem with my school.)

Although, I have not personally experienced many things I wrote about, I live in a culture that is directly effected by them, and it is indeed personal to me in many ways.

Things become personal when you start to care.

I decided to share my essay here. Because I think people need to be informed. Because I think people need to care. And because I think people need to stop pretending this issue doesn’t exist by hiding it under the covers and refusing to level with it.

Just a slight warning: This topic is heavy and real. Depending on individual parenting choices, this post may not be suitable for kids. That’s up to you. I always try to be respectful and tactful when writing graphic material, but you can’t avoid the obvious. I’m not scared to use real terms.

However, I won’t leave graphic reality in front of you without presenting the reality of hope as well. I’m going to continue this topic in separate posts. So hang around, it gets a whole lot better. 🙂

Here is my essay:

Why the Porn Industry Should Be Nonexistent

The topic of pornography is no longer taboo in modern society. In fact, in recent years it has become a normal part of life for a large portion of society. Pornography may seem like a harmless fantasy world, but I as I have studied and observed, I am convinced it has massive negative effects on society. I believe the porn industry should be nonexistent.

Pornography trains men to be heartless, and makes them slaves to the sexual beast inside. Men are protectors. It’s a natural born instinct. If boys are raised on porn ,they will begin to view the women in their lives as objects of their fantasies. They will lose all respect for women. We are raising a generation that doesn’t know how to value and cherish the women in their life. Instead of protecting women, society is being shown how to abuse and disrespect them. Pornography is the enemy of male protecting instincts.

Porn is the enemy of relationships built on trust and love. Wives become frustrated because they cannot measure up to the high standard of her husband’s porn influenced fantasies. Husbands compare their wives to the images they’ve seen, and in the end, both partners are left feeling dissatisfied with themselves. Broken marriages result in divorce torn homes and confused, un-trusting children. Porn destroys relationships.

Can you think of any little girl that dreams of being a porn star when she grows up? On the contrary, little girls want to be mothers, nurses, lawyers, accountants, and a myriad of other occupations. They dream of a prince charming that will love them. No little girl dreams of a lifestyle of slavery to an abusive occupation.

No woman or teenager would ever choose a life of mistreatment under normal circumstances. Many porn stars come from broken homes and are preyed on by the porn industry because of their young susceptibleness. The teenage brain is not yet developed to maturity, and is often not capable of making decisions based on his/her well-being. Taking advantage of a young mind by promising fame and luxury (which the porn industry does not provide) is just a glimpse of the filthy, deceitful thought process behind the porn industry.

Porn is not a realistic premise for healthy sexual education. The stars are actors. They learn to act according to the demand of the viewers. The sexual acts they perform are not for pleasure or by choice. It is simply fantasy entertainment, at the cost of numb souls in the adult industry.

No woman in real life wants to be called “bitch” or “whore” hundreds of times a day. No woman wants to be slapped, gagged with bodily fluids, beaten, or raped by five males until she is limp and crying. The verbal abuse and degradation in the industry whittles away at any remaining bits of sanity, security, femininity, and sense of identity of women in the sex industry.

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If men truly think pain is pleasure, they have long lost the hearts and respect of women everywhere. Women long to cherished and adored. No woman would ever choose abuse and humiliation over a lover’s kiss.

Get back to reality.

The porn industry is the breeding ground for drugs, alcohol, and suicide. Porn stars need coping methods for their miserable lifestyles. Drugs, alcohol, and suicide are all methods to dull or end the misery.

People defend the porn industry by claiming it to be akin to any other workplace. I beg to differ. If the porn industry would be a safe and sanitary workplace, there would not be rampant STDs within its walls.

We all agree that rape is a crime and should be prosecuted under the fullest extent of the law. However, few female porn stars in the industry escape multiple rapes, on camera and off, often at the hands of the movie producers themselves. These crimes cannot be overlooked.

Porn stars are real people with parents and a life story. They are not objects to hurt and misuse. Porn stars are fantasized over online, but shunned in the real world. These women (and men) lead unfulfilled, broken lives, yet we insist upon fantasizing over daughters, sisters, and mothers. We support a human being’s demise by giving ourselves over to porn addiction.

Many porn stars would like to change their lifestyles, but they see no way out. Sex may be the only skill they have, and people won’t hire uneducated porn stars for a waitressing job. We should be providing rehabilitation and job opportunities for porn stars who long for different lifestyles, instead of contributing to the industry by striving to satisfy unnatural fantasies.

Think about the consequences of pornography that I’ve exposed. Rethink your decision to watch porn. Porn ruins lives. Don’t support it. I look for a day when pornography will be nonexistent.

 The end.

All of us also lived among them at one time, gratifying the cravings of our sinful nature and following its desires and thoughts. Like the rest, we were by nature objects of wrath.
But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved! – Ephesians 2:1-5

Watch for part 2

 © Brenda Bender

6 thoughts on “Porn [Part 1] Negative effects of porn on our culture and why my essay was rejected.

  1. Hello I found this article randomly while browsing Food for thoughts and figured I’d give your essay a read, and give you an honest opinion and criticism.

    I like you believe that porn has mild to serious negative social and domestic impacts, however I must say now that your essay speaks of alot of subjectivity on your part towards this specific matter, and the only way to truly tackle a societal problem is to tackle it objectively from all it’s facets. So if this issue is truly a matter you have at heart I would suggest acquiring quite alot more information and understanding of that environment and I would suggest a few points for you to gain understanding of. Let me first say that I’m an economic student with interests in societal structures, and I believe I have some understing of the stripper/porn industry from being porn in a poor environment and personally knowing a few women having made that choice in life, and from personal reflexions and reading on the subject.

    Sorry for that long preface! Anyway, first I believe you strongly need to dispel some of the misinformed perceptions you have about the women operating in this trade. I’m unsure about other countries, but the american porn industry is fairly well structured and most women working in it lead good, fulfilled lives. Of course as for any other profession there is a minority that will be struggling with personal issues but that cannot really be identified as a direct consequence of being a porn actor(ess). You need to understand first that a woman with a stable life and no traumatic and/or mental issues can perfectly make the decision to use her own body as an object of income. Particularly in the large porn industry, that industry is actually one of the safest haven for the women who will ultimately want to use their body for money, as it is strongly regulated, supervised and well remunerated. Official porn actresses for the most part lead very decent and good lives.

    Now, the lower down the industry you go however, the darker it gets, for the performers. But secondly, you need to recognise that the industry and place porn has in households now is not really problematic for the consquences it has on the performers itself.

    I’ll open a big sidenote here. Most of your essay in it’s current form assaults issues akin more to those born of prostitution, which is a struggle thousands years old than pornography. Prostitution, which can be related but should never be confused with pornography, has very serious consequences on the individuals performing it in general. Again you need to be reminded that women can and will decide to opt for prostitution as a viable “path of life” with no previous history of abuse, trauma or low self-esteem. Individuals have varying perceptions of attachments, bonds, and “intercourse sanctity”. And women can also operate as prostitute and not subish any psychological symptoms. The impact of such actions and decisions varies inevitably from individual to invidiual and is based on mental resilience, beliefs, expections and preestablished values. However prostitution is something most individuals will come out of with different psychological “symptoms” due to the fact that it is unregulated and mostly left to the criminal domain.

    If you bear at heart the wellbeing of the performers of “sexual depravity” as you seem to view it over that of those being affected by the viewing of pornography, as I believed your essay tackled, I will say something that will no doubt confuse you but is albeit true and is another point you should study upon. For the victims of most criminal domains(of substance abuse/providing of services, such as sexual), the best thing that can happen is regulation. To have regulation, there needs to be social acceptance. Yes indeed while a minority will make choices in their lives that the majority will view as negative, self-destructive and a myriad of other things, it is impossible to root out this aspect of humanity entirely. And as a society those who feel(have) orderly, responsible and balanced lives will naturally want to help those they view as suffering from destructive vices, but also due to our pejorative perception of these vices and the impacts they have on the individuals we seek to shun these vices and try to erase them. This is a mistake, and a wrong reaction. This emotional response is part of a social problem that creates environments for victims of “negative impacts”. Whatever society takes upon accepting and regulating gets elevated to a standard around that of the society and “civilised”. For exemple, taking drugs. Our society is only now beginning to understand that it is better to accept and “support”, loosely of course, drug addicts in their vice as it is simply a better solution in all ways and forms because we are assisting them, as a society, rather than trying to preach to them to change their ways while leaving them to be the victims of ill intended drug dealers who will bring them to ruin. Heroin clinics are now becoming a societal norm and they are greatly, greatly improving the conditions of heroin addicts. It is impossible to force decisions upon individuals. It is therefore impossible to force upon another individual the decision to not take drugs or to not use one’s body for monetary gain. This is hard to understand, as individuals, and as a society­. And it is important to think that fighting against the decision is not the way to solve any problem. People will keep making decisions we view as harmful to themselves and others and you, and society must understand that this cannot be prevented. What can be done however is set every opportunities possible for alternative routes at any points and EDUCATION TO ALTERNATIVE LIFESTYLES/DECISIONS, In porn and substance use, societal acceptance brought many crucial sanitary regulations and greatly tones down the rampancy of insalubrity and disease spreading. Moreover and closer to this subject, in countries where PROSTITUTION is socially accepted and regulated, prostitutes are followed by a clinician and frequently run tests for sexually transmitted disease, which eradicated disease transmission in those areas, have therapist and councelor easily accessible to them and have many social profressional available to either try and help them have ordered and structured lives operating as sex workers OR find numerous other opportunities in their lives, such as finding grants for academics and other trades. In no country where prostitution is not socially accepted do sex workers have such good life conditions. In most developped countries still, prostitution is not accepted and unregulated, which means cartel and crime run that industry. Because we don’t accept it, we do not ask prostitutes to declare their field of work or revenues. Because we don’t, we don’t have records of which women operate as prostitutes. We do not assign responsible and morally correct bureaucrats or business entrepreneurs because it is not a recognised industry which results in the crime de facto becoming providers and tenants. Because we leave this particular service to crime, women operating as prostitutes are not followed and assisted by health advisors, therapists, carreer counselors and other trained professionals. Many women will decide to use their body for money as a result of a lack of easily accessible education or foreseeable alternatives. Which means giving the women the possibility to easily gain access to education either general or professional, and giving them access to professional who can show them the possible alternatives is KEY in fighting against this and is MUCH MORE EFFECTIVE than opressing the act of being a sex worker in itself, pushing it underground, forcing the sex workers to be secluded from society and not going to reach out to the social services that would give them opportunities NOT to make these choices. By abolishing prostitution, we are in great part responsible in preventing women from getting help and shutting them out to be prey to criminal entrepreneurs. Women do not stop to be prostitutes because we tell them it’s illegal. Women stop being prostitutes because they find by themselves or through our help that there is a million ways to realize one’s life and there may be better more comfortable alternatives to the route they’re currently on.

    If you read this entire previous paragraph thinking of the porn industry, you should understand a bit why abolishing the porn industry would only push it underground, hand it over entirely to criminality and would NOT stop women from being porn actresses or try to be, but would only SEVERELY DEGRADE their living conditions.

    Yes porn has negative sideeffects on the common household watchers, but it has CLEAR POSITIVE effects for the performers themselves. Women performing in pornography are better off and this is a studied factor, than if pornography were not as accepted as it is today. Many of these women made the choice of using their body as an object before first attempting to enter the porn industry and the porn industry effectively provides thousands of women a safe, well remunerated and UNDISEASED alternative to less desirable paths such as shoddy bars stripping or prostitution. Hundreds more women would effectively mostly operate in a prostitution cartel if it weren’t for today’s porn industry and this is one of the few studied positive aspects of it.

    When trying to understand social problems it is extremely important you understand human creatures are exceptional in that we each mold our upbringing, experiences, values and perceptions of reality to create very distinct individuals, and you must never generalize, which is a huge issue in your essay.

    Thus I suggest you do not hope for the day porn will be non existent. That is an utopia that will never be possible. There cannot be a day where no man on earth will know hatred as it only takes one individual with hatred in his breast to bear it into his brother, son, neighbhor or cowoker, Out of billions of human beings the bad traits of humanity will never be completely eradicated and that is something we must come to accept. Sexual desires and depravity are born out of everything we learn about normal sexual interactions in our given social environment and there will never be one universal way for humans to feel attraction and inhibition or lack thereof. Some women actually do decide to be strippers/porn actresses merely because they consider themselves “lazy but attractive” and find using their body is a much easier carreer path than long years of academics and it’s actually us who decide whether we give them safe and well regulated possibilities of operating under that particular life decision or whether we force them to be “illegal” and expose them to be victims of our lack of support because the criminal world offers much less structure and care for the individual than our society standards.

    Porn is however, in my perception, harmful to the general society because of the position it managed to grasp in the common household which makes it much too abudant and easily accessible and is potentially breeding alot of flawed sexual expections, misadaptions and devious tendencies in an ever younger demographic, it is dangerous to young adults who have not yet built their own experiences and understanding of sexuality and will be drawn to pornography inevitably, and build flawed perceptions and expectations. It then has impacts on relationships in the young adult demographic as an ever increasing population of young adults is exposed to pornography which gives a pre-defined perception of what should be “normal” sexual expections from then on, which coupled with the over-sexualisation of media and publicity creates a real social problem where young adults struggle increasingly to find healthy relationship balances due to erroneous expections of how things should be, men and women set physical appearance and shape as a stronger attraction standard than individual traits and personality as a side-effect of this over-exposure and it contributes alot to negative self-awareness that many people feel.about their physical appearance. A very serious concern towards the porn industry is that it is now present in households just like television is. In modern times the internet has become something as common as television and we forget it also is for children. Children develop sexual curiosity through curiosity for their own body before they are capable of fully mentally comprehending all the interpersonal implications of a sexual intercourse, and it is very hard(and often not taken in consideration enough) to block all access to pornography on the internet. Exposure to sexuality is not negative in itself to the development of an individual, but overexposure, especially to stranger, more eccentric forms of intercourses like fetishes can lead to learned and deeply rooted misexpectations of interpersonal relations in general, intercourse or not.

    I’ve written this for a while now and time is running short, I have something to attend, and I realize I mostly sidetracked from my original message intent. I’m sorry if I seemed perhaps a bit harsh but I only seek to be truthful and honest. I believe you have alot to understand still, especially about the women, the reasons and the impacts on them from their decision of operating in the porn industry, but also about where and what the impacts really are. I believe and I would suggest you to research that pornography being a recognised industry is inevitably good for the women operating in it as it ensures them decent living conditions and remunerations and a safe possibility to make a living from the objectification of their bodies without being exposed to criminality.

    These are my views and opinions, if you’ve read this I hope you felt it was constructive and objective. I enjoyed reading your paper and share your values and views but I strongly encourage you to gain much deeper understanding. 🙂

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    • Hello, thanks for commenting. I don’t want to argue. I am passionate, yes. No, I might not always have my facts straight, and I’ve never been a porn star personally. I care though, and I have read many stories from ex porn stars, ex pornographers, and girls rescued from the slave trade. I have experienced personally the effect pornography has on the viewer. I have heard the stories that the industry would never own up to. No, that doesn’t make me the final word on the subject. 🙂
      I realize that some women in the sex industry may be convinced in their minds they are satisfied with their lifestyles, I grant you that. But I am convinced that every human being, no matter how hard or cold their hearts, at some point knows or has known they were made for more than what they are getting out of life. Crime is just a symptom of desire. We want fulfillment pleasure, purpose, identity. It’s a human desire we all try to fill with money, sex, lust, power, greed, you name it. People may not admit or know what is driving them, but the human nature has been the same for hundreds of years.
      I care deeply about those with sexual wounds, whether it be through prostitution, pornography, sex trafficking, incest, rape etc etc…. I know pornography may be “legal,” but to me, it is only a platform for women to give sex for money legally…which is still prostitution, right? It may be safer in a way, but I try not to put degrees on pain. I want to care about it all.
      If you read part 2 and 3 of this series I wrote on sexuality, you’ll discover why I say the things I do. It’s because I’m Christian, and I believe in a holy God who created pure and beautiful sexuality. Having experienced some bad and even more good, holy sexuality no one can convince me that that pornography, rape, sex slavery, and prostitution is healthy and ok. Forget the degrees of pain and “wrongness” of these categories. It’s not the real thing, and I care that people discover they can have a better life!!

      Part 1 was directed at the public as an awareness essay of sorts. (It was for school.) part 2 and 3 are focused more on answers and recovery from sexual wounds and issues, whether as a porn addict, victim of abuse, etc.

      As long as this world has imperfect humans in it, there will be sin, and yes sexual perversion. I don’t know if pornography will always be legal, but it’s my hope that people who care will offer hope and help to those who want a healthy lifestyle and freedom from addiction and bondage. I think if porn would go extinct, it would be more of an outrage to porn viewers than performers. An addicted society is a weak society.

      I am a believer in God, but I don’t feel it’s my job to shove my beliefs down their throats. (those who don’t believe, people in the sex industry, etc.) I won’t scold them for having sex before they’re married and participating in degrading perverted sex acts that wound them. But should I ever talk with a prostitute or porn star, I will love her and hopefully be able to tell her about a God that made her beautiful, cares about her heart, and has a future for her.

      I’m sorry if my writing is offensive. I’m not a professional writer, and I don’t know it all. Like I said, my passion sometimes may overtake my writing skills. 🙂

      Hope this helped clear some of the confusion. Thanks for taking the time to read my post.

      Like

  2. You are very sufficient corret this thing is destroying the world not us only who is against it,it’s a pleasure to know things which we humans do not realise them as bad things hoping to live a bravo life by not letting this in our lives to be a thing which is a usually a daily day thing

    Like

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    Like

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