[PART 2] “Paul’s thorn” misconceptions and Jesus’ adopted generation [a real talk]

You can read the juicy first addition of this subject here.

Here’s a little excerpt from my own journey, just to keep things real.

I have scoliosis, which is basically a curved spine. My particular spinal angle has created uneven distribution of muscle near my shoulder blades. Because of the curve angle, the muscle mass on the right side is considerably larger than the left. The curved spine also resulted in my rib cage forming abnormally or unevenly while I was growing. It hurts, sometimes worse than others.

I have to be careful with the type and amount of exercise I do because I not only have to deal with normal soreness, but the extra strain on the curve, which can be extremely painful. I have adapted rather well though. Regular chiropractic adjustments help with headaches when my neck or spine is out of alignment, (more than the normal curve obviously) and I know that healthy food and lifestyle choices are my job in keeping God’s temple working properly.

Scoliosis stinks though, to be honest.

I was fresh out of a conservative, religious setting, where I rarely encountered physical miracles, when a woman I didn’t know approached me and prayed for my back. I was dealing with a lot of inner turmoil, and I desperately craved support and prayer. I remember sitting in a hallway when she walked past me. I quietly asked God to make her come back to me, and incredibly, she turned on her heel and walked directly towards me. I wasn’t doubting that God heard me that day.  🙂

“Maybe something is wrong with me that God doesn’t want to heal my back.” I cried with unbelief and rejection. The woman was horrified, and told me God’s heart was far removed from those lies. “Its as simple as believing.” I was pretty traumatized by the whole situation, especially when she got me to say some declarations of healing out loud when I felt no physically different and still distinctly felt the curve on my back. Am I sad that my symptoms remained after that encounter? Yes. I don’t understand why. But I am completely confident in His heart manifested in that woman’s love and listening ear when God told her to come back and talk to me.

I am still tempted to think I am a chosen thorn bearer, but part of finding victory from lies that come from the father of lies is recognizing the difference between thinking and being spoken to. I realize that now. The sickening feeling that washed over me in that hallway saying, “I don’t qualify,” was not a feeling or a thought of my own. It was a voice, and agreeing with it is an excellent example of adopting an orphan spirit.

Negative self talk is a huge sign of orphan mentality:  “I suck. I’m not smart. I’ll never amount to anything.”

“Bad luck syndrome” is another big one. “I’ll never crawl out of debt. Things never work out for me. If lightening strikes, it’ll be sure to find me first.”

Self pity: “I’m alone. I’m always a third wheel.”

Father misconceptions: “God doesn’t really care. God won’t bless me because of my faults. God is out to get me with a stick. God is waiting for me to mess up.”

The list could go on and on.

I am not a fan of making or hearing negative declarations about one’s life, so if you do so in my presence, watch out. 😀 We prophecy without knowledge when we speak words of death about ourselves, our circumstances, or others. I don’t know about you, but if I’m going to prophecy, it better be an agreement with God, and not the enemy.

I’m telling you, start agreeing with God’s favor on your life and watch your physical circumstances change. A huge key in seeing fruitful manifestations is making verbal declarations of agreement with God. Choose the seeds you plant. You’ll get rotten fruit from rotten seeds.

If we expect to love our neighbor as ourselves, we need to value ourselves and live like champions who know our identity in Christ.

Although I don’t enjoy the presence of physical pain, I will not use that as an excuse to stop contending for the truth. Every time I go down that path of orphan thinking, there is torment. In fact, my back hurts much worse in the times I focus on what Satan is trying to destroy. I have the choice to say no to lies or yes to God.

No, I’m am not talking about positive thinking. I’m talking about basic prophetic agreements with God. With truth, there is freedom, not just outlook adjustments.

I also won’t let my pain keep me from contending for the wholeness of other individuals and celebrating their joys. I could be jealous when someone receives healing after I pray for them, but that would mean believing that God favors others more than me, which is a lie. Do you see the pattern? We are an adopted generation, not an orphan culture. I want to live it.

What we focus on grows; that is why I refuse to remain upset about physical burdens. I do get mad sometimes, but I want to give Jesus all the focus in my circumstances so His glory can be manifested physically in my life, as it is in Heaven. I give Satan no glory for my pain, and it is my mandate to speak His kingdom over my physical issues whether I see results now, tomorrow, or never. (Although I fully expect to in my lifetime)

I believe God’s heart is to heal the sick. That makes me excited. Yes, I have taken before pictures of my back in preparation for the after. 🙂

With all wisdom and understanding, He made known to us the mystery of his will according to his good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ, to be put into effect when the times reach their fulfillment—to bring unity to all things in heaven and on earth under Christ.

When you believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession—to the praise of his glory. Ephesian 1: 8b-10

Those verses blow my mind! Incredible.

One more story. Some of you may remember a past post I dedicated to my friend Briana. Read the post here.

I never wrote a followup post, but I am including it here along with the theme of this post.

Background info: In June of 2013, Bri was diagnosed with Aids. In Aug. of 2013, Bri was diagnosed with an Aids related cancer. (Kaposi’s Sarcoma) In Sept, shocked doctors found her blood perfectly Aids free, and it was said she now had a fighting chance at beating her cancer with a perfect, restored blood count! Boom.

Doctors predicted her death, (3 months, give or take) and she has currently passed August by 7 MONTHS, and she is still very ALIVE in 2014. God is so awesome, and her life is in His very capable hands. I am so glad she did not make agreements with her sickness. I honestly feel like her past and future healing have been a result of agreement with God. She is highly favored! I am so excited about that and all He’s still going to do. He is worthy of praise! I am still contending for perfect health for my sweet friend. Your agreement and prayers are welcome too!

I love declarations. (good ones) There is something so powerful about speaking truth out loud for both kingdoms to hear. If you are struggling with breaking off ties of agreement with the enemy, declarations are a super way to build yourself up in Christ. Here is a good one that came to me a few weeks ago. Feel free to say it out loud to prophesy God’s favor over your future, and to let Satan know you are not on his side!

I will not be offended by God for things He does not do. I will not hold God responsible for what I don’t understand, and I will not blame Him for the consequences of living in a fallen world.

I recognize that my home is in my Father’s kingdom, and He has already overcome. I am weak in this world, but in me, He is strong.

God will never waste the pain the enemy and sin have already dealt me, but from now on, I will speak His promises over my hopes because His words do not return void.

I will see mountains move and impossibilities bow to the King because this is what I do know for sure: Jesus is here to heal the brokenhearted, to free the captives, to heal mental, physical, and emotional illness, to restore spirits who are crushed, to replace mourning with joy, to exchange depression and heaviness for garments of praise, to bring financial breakthrough, and many other breakthroughs personal to each need. Why? Because Isaiah 29:11 says His plans for me are for hope and a future.

His banner over me is love. Satan is defeated, and Jesus is King. I will live like it’s true. I believe; Help my unbelief.


Go in His Presence, people. It brings freedom.



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